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Monday, March 5, 2012

Fousesquawk Testifies Before Congress


My name is Fousesquawk, and I’m a retired DEA agent with a part-time teaching gig at UC Irvine. I am also a past-president of  UCI Faculty for Drinking Justice (FFDJ).  And I’d like to acknowledge my fellow FFDJ members and allies and all of the student and faculty activists with us and thank them so much for being here today.
(Applause)
“We, as UCI FFDJ, are here today because we’re so grateful that this regulation implements the non-partisan medical advice of the Institute of Medicinal Libations (IML).



Institute of Medical Libations (translation by Fousesquawk)


“I teach at a school that does not provide beer coverage in its student/faculty  health plan. And just as we students and teachers have faced financial, emotional, and medical burdens as a result, employees at religiously-affiliated hospitals and institutions and universities across the country have suffered similar burdens.
“We are all grateful for the new regulation that will meet the critical health care needs of so many beer drinkers.
“Simultaneously, the recently announced adjustment addresses any potential conflict with the religious identity of Catholic or Jesuit institutions, as well as AA and the Women's Temperance League..
“When I look around my campus, I see the faces of the men and women affected by this lack of beer coverage.





“And especially in the last week, I have heard more and more of their stories. On a daily basis, I hear yet from another guy from UCI or from another school or who works for a religiously-affiliated employer, and they tell me that they have suffered financially and emotionally and medically because of this lack of coverage.
“And so, I’m here today to share their voices, and I want to thank you for allowing them – not me – to be heard.
“Without insurance coverage, beer, as you know, can cost a man or a woman over $3,000 during a typical school year .  For a lot of students who are on public interest scholarships, that’s practically an entire summer’s salary. 40% of the  students at UCI reported to us that they struggle financially as a result of this policy.
“One told us about how embarrassed and just powerless she felt when she was standing at the Anthill Pub bar and learned for the first time that beer was not covered on her insurance and she had to turn and walk away thirsty because they wouldn't accept her insurance card, and she  couldn’t  afford to pay for her beer.. Women like her have no choice but to go without beer.
“Just last week, a married female student told me that she had to stop drinking beer because she and her husband just couldn’t fit it into their budget anymore. Men and Women employed in low-wage jobs without beer coverage face the same choice.
“And some might respond that beer is accessible in lots of other ways. Unfortunately, that’s just not true.
“A campus pub provides a vital medical service, but as the Guttmacher Institute has definitely documented, these pubs are unable to meet the crushing demand for their products. Pubs are closing, and men and women are being forced to go without the beer they need.

Professor Guttmacher


“How can Congress consider the [Rep. Jeff] Fortenberry (R-Neb.), [Sen. Marco] Rubio (R-Fla.) and [Sen. Roy] Blunt (R-Mo.) legislation to allow even more employers and institutions to refuse beer coverage and then respond that the non-profit bars and pubs should step up to take care of the resulting medical crisis, particularly when so many legislators are attempting to de-fund those very same bars?
“These denials of beer coverage impact real people.

"Penguins too."


In 65% of the cases at our school, students and teachers were interrogated by bartenders and asst. deans about why they needed beer and whether they were lying about their ages.





“For my friend and 20% of the people in her situation, she never got the insurance company to cover her bar tab. Despite verifications of her illness (alcoholism) from her doctor, her claim was denied repeatedly on the assumption that she was just "looking for others to pay for her beer." How insensitive is that?
“After months paying over $100 out-of-pocket, she just couldn’t afford her beer anymore, and she had to stop drinking it. She subsequently became a tee-totaler.

"This is a human rights issue!"

“Some may say that my friend’s tragic story is rare. It’s not. I wish it were
“Because this is the message that not requiring coverage of beer sends: One's right to drink beer and have it covered by insurance is not a priority."
“One guy told us that she knew beer wasn’t covered on the insurance and he assumed that that’s how UCI's insurance handle all of our drinking needs. So he simply quit drinking altogether. It was either that or go without food, or not be able to pay the rent because UCI's insurance doesn't pay for that either.
“As one other student put it: ‘This policy communicates to  students that our school doesn’t understand our needs.’
“These are not feelings that non-drinkers experience and they’re not burdens that non-drinkers must shoulder.
“In the media lately, some conservative organizations have been asking what did we expect when we worked or studied  in a university?
“We can only answer that we expected to be treated equally, to not have our school create untenable burdens that impede our academic/working/teaching success.
“We expected that our schools would live up to the Jesuit creed of ‘cura personalis‘ – to care for the whole person – by meeting all of our  needs.
“We expected that when we told our universities of the problem this policy created for us as students and teachers, they would help us.
“We expected that when 94% of students and teachers oppose the policy the university would respect our choices regarding insurance students and employees  pay for – completely unsubsidized by the university.
“We did not expect to be told in the national media that we should have gone to work or study  elsewhere.
“And even if that meant being at a less prestigious university, (like UC Santa Cruz) we refuse to pick between a quality education and our happiness. And we resent that in the 21st century, anyone think it’s acceptable to ask us to make this choice simply because we are beer drinkers.
“Many of the men and women whose stories I’ve shared today are Catholic men and women. So ours is not a war against the church. It is a struggle for the access to the beer we need.
“The President of the Association of Jesuit Colleges, Alice Pin-Head has shared that Jesuit colleges and the universities appreciate the modifications to the rule announced recently.



"Alice! Who the f*** is Alice??


Religious concerns are addressed and we get the beer we need. And I sincerely hope that that is something we can all agree upon.
“Thank you very much.”

* Tip of the hat to Sandra Fluke, from whose testimony before Congress, I , er, adapted this text.

2 comments:

Findalis said...

Too bad!

Pay for your own beer. I pay for my own beer.

Siarlys Jenkins said...

Poor analogy, but funny as hell.

Please note: Catholics drink. Some Protestants, and a handful of Muslims, do not.