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Tuesday, January 25, 2011

State of the Union- Tonight's Official Text



You heard it here first, folks. Just in. The official text of President Obama's State of the Union address provided to Fousesquawk by a secret inside source.

"My fellow Americans,

We need to create jobs, jobs, jobs.

We also need to invest in our future, invest in our children, and invest in education.


".............people like (pick a name)" (camera shoots to the upper boxes to someone sitting next to the First Lady.)

"Blah blah blah, woof woof woof, quack quack quack."

"God bless America"

Reactions? Chris Matthews will declare it a "State of the Union for the ages"

Sean Hannity will say it sucked.

And Keith Olbermann?  Heh heh. I guess we won't know what he has to say.
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Post-speech update: I told you.

7 comments:

Siarlys Jenkins said...

I don't know exactly what Our President will say, but I expect I would by and large approve, but, conclude that I could have written a bolder and more assertive text, if he had asked me. He's still the best leadership we've had in about half a century.

Gary Fouse said...

Siarlys,

Yes indeed. Greatest president since Jimmy Carter.

Findalis said...

Hit it on the nail.

Ingrid said...

Leave Jimmy out ot this.

Siarlys Jenkins said...

Well, I don't mind. The best since Jimmy Carter means better than Ronald Reagan, George HW Bush, Bill Clinton, and George W. Bush... But half a century goes back to 1961. Since I can do simple subtraction better than Gary (he's an English teacher, not a math teacher), I can figure it out to... best president since John F. Kennedy.

Gary Fouse said...

Siarlys,

You fail to fathom my humore. How about worst since Jimmy Carter?

Siarlys Jenkins said...

It's a little late Gary... you said "best," and I took you at your word. You were playing off my use of the word "best" too. By the time you have to explain the joke it's not funny anymore, not to mention amending it to death.