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Tuesday, March 1, 2016

This is Not Your Rick Steves Europe

Hat tip Vlad Tepes


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Imagine being on a European vacation with travel guru Rick Steves. Imagine being on a cruise on the Danube with Rick as you pass the stately spires of Budapest.

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Now imagine you and Rick trying to catch a train at the Budapest train station, which is clogged with other "travelers".
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No trip to Europe would be complete without a stop in Italy. Imagine you and Rick sitting on the Via Veneto sipping wine and watching the world go by.

Now imagine you and Rick on Lampedusa Island enjoying the sunny Mediterranean.

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In France, imagine you and Rick sailing through Paris on the Seine with Notre Dame in the background.

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Imagine you and Rick trying to travel from France to England via the English Channel tunnel between Calais and England with hundreds of migrants blocking your way, trying to board your truck, or throwing projectiles at you.

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Traveling in Germany (We couldn't get through the English Channel) imagine you and Rick sailing down the Rhine past Cologne with its famed Dom cathedral in the background.
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Then imagine you and Rick arriving in Cologne via train on New Years Eve and getting caught up in the celebrations with hundreds of "asylum-seekers" sexually assaulting every German woman they can get their hands on.

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Now imagine you and Rick, finally in England via a roundabout way, arriving at Buckingham Palace on one of those double-decker tour buses.


Now imagine Rick and you being greeted out front by hundreds of screaming "Londoners", led by a guy named Anjem Choudary and another guy picking his nose, chanting, "Burn, burn Buckingham".


After touring London, you and Rick set out for the charming English countryside to see what smaller towns look like. Imagine you and Rick exploring an authentic English town away from the beaten road.

A town like the Grooming City of Rotherham, for example.

Imagine you and Rick walking the streets of Rotherham and gazing at all the young girls who walk around with vacant stares. Imagine admiring the rich diversity of Rotherham.



You and Rick won't see these chaps. They have "gone away" for awhile. Something to do with those young girls with the vacant stares.

The next stop on your itinerary is Sweden, the Land of....Well, I'm not really sure what Sweden is the land of these days, but no mind. Imagine you and Rick arriving by boat at Malmo, the third largest city in Sweden.

Now imagine you and Rick touring Malmo's famous  "No-Go zone" of Rosengard. I recommend going at night by car (with blackened windows so the residents can't tell you are of European descent.) I recommend going by night so you can watch the famous fireworks.

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Also not to be missed are Malmo's old synagogues, now deserted and historical relics of the old Jewish community. One day, the Jews of Malmo just picked up and left. Nobody to this day knows why.

But by now, you are probably ready to get back to the USA, right?


"Uhhhh.....yeaaaaah."

Maybe next year, you could ask Rick if he can organize a tour to Asia-say the Floating Market of Bangkok.


"Uhhh....yeaaaaah."

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