Tuesday, August 18, 2015
Nixon and Kennedy Discussing Hillary's Email Problems
"Hey Ted! It's me, Dick."
"You tell me. I've been reading about this email business with Hillary Clinton."
"Yeah. It's bad. It's so bad, even Bob Woodward is comparing her to you and Watergate."
"That's bad, alright."
"They're even saying it may cause her to drop out of the presidential race. She may even be indicted."
"Wow. Last time I saw that b----- was at my funeral. She was sitting there looking bored while her husband was saying nice things about me. That was strange."
What was strange, her looking bored?"
"No. It was strange that someone was saying nice things about me."
"Listen. If you see her, I got a tip to pass along."
"Well, I won't be seeing her. That's for sure, but what's the tip?"
"Tell her to burn the emails. That was my big f-up. I didn't burn the tapes."
"It's not that easy, Dick. Times have changed. Nowadays, it's all digital."
"What does that mean?"
"It's all computerized. Even if you erase it, they can still find it."
"The FBI has even seized her thumb drive that she gave to her lawyer, David Kendall."
"Huh? Since when is the FBI investigating sex offenses?"
"There is no sex offense. You must have been thinking about one of my driving investigations."
"No, it's just that -Hell- what does it mean that she gave her thumb drive to David what's his name? It sounds like some kooky newfangled sex act that I never heard of."
"No, a thumb drive is a little gadget where your messages are stored. It's the size of a thumb."
"I still don't get it, but there weren't enough thumbs in the world to hide all the stuff I needed to get rid of."
"Never mind. Listen, I gotta go."
"Where the Hell you gotta go, Teddie boy? You're dead, remember?"
"I got a hot date with my next door neighbor. She's a hottie."
"You wouldn't. That's, that's..... "