Translate


Friday, March 20, 2015

The Hound of the Baskervilles

Names and places have been changed to protect the idiotic.


Image result for keith morrison


They say nothing much ever happens in Baskerville Hills, a quiet, leafy neighborhood that overlooks the University of Nevada at Elko campus. Inhabited by university faculty, most everybody looks alike, thinks alike, and pretty much gets on with their lives living in a tranquil world of theories. To put it mildly, there usually isn't much to talk about once the professors return home and the night descends over Baskerville Hills.

That is until a few days ago when something happened that disrupted the quiet routine of Baskerville Hills.

Image result for pit bull

A pit bull-with no apparent owner- was spotted roaming the winding, hilly streets of Baskerville Hills. A neighbor spotted the suspicious intruder and chased it into the local recreation area where the dog jumped into the swimming pool and had to be rescued.

But the story doesn't end here.

A couple of days later, there was that same pit bull once again roaming the streets. No leash, no collar, no owner.

Could this be a modern day Hound of the Baskerville Hills?

This sparked a neighborhood reaction as residents took to their local list serve to discuss what should be done about the mysterious prowler. During all the back and forth, one anonymous person ventured a very politically-incorrect comment.

"Maybe it is time for dog owners to take control of their animals."


At that moment, every flower in Baskerville Hills died.

In response, one professor jumped into the discussion to come to the defense of pit bulls and those who own them. According to the learned professor, pit bulls represent the racist, middle class attitudes of American society.

That is because, the professor continued, racist Americans associate pit bulls with street gangs, you know, Mexican, Salvadoran, and African-American types. Thus, American society has hung an unfair and racist label on pit bulls-and those who own them, you see.


The professor went on to explain how many of us who view Latino and African-American men as "frightening" have no problem "breed-profiling" the dogs that are identified with them. The professor ended with a plea to "stop from fomenting middle class panic by spreading rumors and fear about alleged dangers that are racially marked."



And that seemingly put the issue to rest-at least until the next time another pit bull is spotted roaming the otherwise tranquil streets of Baskerville Hills.

Image result for hound of the baskervilles

"Ahooooooooooo"

1 comment:

Siarlys Jenkins said...

The way to deal with a pit bull is with the business end of a 30.06., or, an AR-15, or a Magnum.

This story does remind me that my father, who was a university professor (chemistry, not sociology), bought a nice little ranch house in the far corner of town from the campus. Most of my playmates' fathers went deer hunting every season. Call it "diversity."