No sooner than President Obama called on us to develop new clean energy sources to replace oil than it has been discovered.
BEER.
Yes beer. All those leading scientists, experts, academians and Nobel prize winners called in by Obama in the wake of the Gulf oil disaster have come up with the solution in a week!
BEER. To be more specific-American Beer.
That's because we don't want to use foreign sources of beer, like Germany, Holland, Belgium and the Czech Republic. Their own products have a far more important use.
DRINKING.
But American beer when you think about it is much more suitable to running our engines. To be specific, the perfect fuel for automobile engines is Budweiser, both Bud and Bud Lite depending on what car you drive.
Both Bud and Bud Lite contain Swillatron, which makes your engine run smoother and keeps it clean. It is also better for the environment.
But is it green?
Absolutely! That's the easiest problem of all. You know that stuff they put in the beer on St Patrick's Day to make it green? Well, from now on all Bud and Bud Lite will contain that secret ingredient. Everyday will be St Patrick's Day!
Of course, there are still a couple of wrinkles to be worked out. For example, your car will need to stop and take a pee about every 10 miles. You will also notice a gradual bulge in your gas tank, which can easily be reduced by driving 100 mph for about 20 minutes.
Conversion has already begun. The US Government has announced the takeover of Anheuser Busch and the re-modeling of their brewery in St Louis (pictured below):
So once again our problem solver in chief has solved the problem. I smell another Nobel prize.
6 comments:
While I agree that Budweiser, Miller, etcetera must have a better use for them than actually drinking, I disagree that American beer, in general, is bad. The craft beer movement in this country is doing some great stuff. It's nice to know that I can go to a concert, ball game, or restaurant and have a Sierra Nevada, Anchor Steam, Widmer, etcetera.
In other words, there is a lot of great American beer out there; it's just not the most popular stuff.
Lance,
Each to his own taste. I agree that the explosion of micro-brews has been the nest thing to happen to American beer.
The beers you list are some of the better American brews but I would not consider them great beer.
Great beers are German beers, Dutch beers, Czech beers, Efes Pilsen (Turkey) San Miguel (Philippines) Bintang, (Indonesia).
Of course, they must be drunk in their own country. Importeds are different.
PS:
When in Vegas, you must go to the Hofbraushaus. It is a part of Hofbrauhaus Munich and the kegs are shipped directly from there to Vegas with no changes. It is truly authentic German beer. (I have also drunk at the Munich HB and I assure you it is authentic. The Pils (Original) is the best, but if you like Hefeweizen (I don't) you will love what they have at the HB.
From what I understand, the Europeans are turning away from their traditional brews and drinking stuff that's more and more like our cruddy stuff.
My mom sent me a link to a Mexican restaurant that she goes to in Minden. They serve Corona there. Why the hell would anybody in Germany want to drink a Corona? Why would anybody in the whole world want to drink a Corona, for that matter? And isn't Bitburger the most popular beer in Germany? I can name you twenty American beers that are better than that one. (I don't think it's bad - just not the pinnacle of German brewing.)
American beers are impressing the Europeans more and more at the international beer competitions, mainly because the American breweries are willing to take some chances. Sometimes they fall on their faces, but sometimes they come up with some good stuff.
The thing is with stuff like Sierra Nevada, Anchor Steam, etcetera, I would consider them to be great beers. However, the styles of each is very different from the European ones. If you drink a Sierra Nevada expecting something that tastes like a Paulaner, you're going to be pretty disappointed. In other words, they're a different sort of a thing and great for different reasons.
But if you want a good lager, then I would agree, you can't beat the European (especially German) beers. There are some decent lagers made here, but what's happening with ales in this country is far more interesting. In fact, I think that the best Pilsner you can get around here is Trumer. I don't know if they have it down there, but I scored a case of it at Costco for about $22.
It's a brewery that has two locations - Austria and Berkeley. It's a better buy than the European imports in my opinion because since it doesn't have to cross an ocean, it's a lot fresher - and Pilsners aren't really beers that you want to age for very long. (The fresher the better, I'd say.) And since they make it just like they do in Austria, it has an authentic European flavor.
Lance,
To each his own and I guess that rasting something new is agreeable for the Euros. I had a friend from Erlangen who swears Sam Adams is the best beer in the world. As for Carona, I agree. I had a Bitburger in Erlangen once and while it was better than Bits I had in the US or Switzerland, I wasn't all that impressed. It is not one of Germany's better brews in my view.
I know of Trummer, but I never had it. If it tastes the same as in Austria, I would say that Austrian beer is nowhere close to german beer.
BTW-If you can find German beer in Mexico, it is more authentic because they don't require additives and pasteurization for imported beers.
But what the hell does this have to do with oil?
I had a friend from Erlangen who swears Sam Adams is the best beer in the world.
Sam Adams is a damn fine beer, but the best in the world? I guess you could do worse.
But what the hell does this have to do with oil?
Beer tastes better.
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