Lady Ashton Meets Vladimir Putin at a Cocktail Party

So the story goes like this:



The scene is in Vienna and the EU delegation led by their foreign affairs head, the Baroness Lady Catherine Ashton, has just finished another tiring and unsuccessful round of negotiations with Russian president Vladimir Putin over the incursion into Ukraine. As is traditional in diplomatic life, no matter how badly the negotiations are going, a cocktail party in the evening is a must.

So it was that a tired and frustrated Lady Ashton walked into the reception and ran into Putin, who was well into his vodka.



Standing across the room from Putin, Lady Ashton saw that Putin was talking with his Russian underlings, pointing at Lady Ashton, and laughing with a sneer on his face.








Indignant, Lady Ashton walked over to Putin and said, "President Putin, you are drunk."

Putin sized up Lady Ashton, looked her up and down and replied, "Yes, My Lady. I am drunk, and you are ugly, but tomorrow, I shall be sober, and you will still be ugly."

Shocked and angry, Lady Ashton replied, " If you were my husband, I would pour arsenic in your vodka."

"Yes, answered Putin. "and if I were your husband, I would drink it."

With all due apologies to the late great Winston Churchill.