Celebrity Endorsements: Barack Obama for Grecian Formula

(Now available in spray)

Friend,

No-this is not a solicitation for three dollars. This time, I am taking a minute off from all my hard work campaigning for re-election to talk to you about Grecian Formula. I'm not talking about that greasy kid stuff you rub in your shampoo to fight off grey hair. I'm talking about the Grecian economic formula as practiced by my Socialist colleagues over in Greece.

Here's how it works.

First you set up a socialist state-just like I'm trying to do here in the 57 states. You create a society where 1/3rd of the populace works for the government and the other 1/3rd doesn't work at all. You appoint a minister (or secretary) of the Treasury like Tim Geithner who doesn't realize that 2/3rds doesn't equal one whole.


Is that Tim Geithner or Rachel Maddow? With Grecian Formula, you can't tell the difference.


Then you provide free stuff to everybody. Free education, free housing, free food-lots of stuff. Eventually, of course, the money runs out. Then people get mad. They occupy places and poop all over police cars demanding their free stuff. That leads to the next step-bailouts. In Greece, they turn to the other countries in the EU (soon they'll turn to us too.) Germany, France, and the other countries that still have money bail out the ones who don't like Greece, Spain, Portugal and Italy. Here in the 57 states, we still do the bailing out ourselves. It's called self-sufficiency. All we do is get the Chinese to underwrite it all.

Eventually, of course, it all comes crashing down-like it is in Greece. But you see, that's the genius of it all because when that happens, you get to build it all back up the way you want it. That is my master plan. I will build the next Greece.

It's called the Grecian Formula. Try it. You will see the results.



You see?