Edward R Murrow Flashback

"And now, the CBS 6 o'clock evening news. Here's Edward R. Murrow."

"Good evening.

I begin tonight with a comment addressed to the President. Mr Eisenhower. You were elected because the people believed in you. You have betrayed that trust. You Sir, have lied and disgraced this nation. Have you no shame?

Now the news. We begin with those frauds over at the Nutty Broadcast Company (NBC), Chet Huntley and David Brinkley. As usual on Nut News, they get their facts wrong as they repeat the Republican talking points. Last night, they repeated the Republican lie that the GOP wants to lower taxes because it will improve the economy. We bring in now our correspondent Mickey Mucho of the Village Vomit. So what do you think, Mickey? You think those two guys over there are porkin' each other?

"Must be, Ed. You know what they say about twin anchors."

"Thanks, Mickey."

"Thanks, Ed."

Next up-worst person in the world. Worse is Vice President Nixon for going down to Venezuela and inciting the populace to riot and attack his car by giving that V sign for victory. One small boy, identified as 8-year-old Hugo Chavez, told reporters that he would never forget this slight to the dignity of the Venezuelan people.

Worser is President Eisenhower, who, when asked for his reaction to the incident, called it an "outrage". When asked why he sent Nixon in the first place, Eisenhower, lining up a putt on the 4th hole, said, "It was the only way I could get the guy out of town."

Why did you choose him as your running mate, Mr President?

But the worst person in the world is second rate actor and politician wanna-be, Ronald Reagan. The latest poison out of this bum is that people don't want what he calls "Big Government". Big Government??? What's that all about?

Ronald Reagan-tonight's worst person in the wooooorld!

That's the news. Good night and good luck."
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That's not the way it was.