Monday, March 23, 2009

Fousesquawk's Form 1040


"Being a CEO ain't all it's cracked up to be."


Like the rest of you, I am doing my income taxes. This is the worst time of year. No football, no baseball-just income taxes-which means either I spend 3 days putting the info together for some tax accountant to charge me 160 bucks to tell me I owe more money to the US and California governments, or I spend 2 weeks trying to do it myself. This year, I thought I would do it in the simplified version. Here goes.

Name: Gary Fouse ssn 000-00-0001
Occupation- CEO blogger (Fousesquawk)
Wife's name: Mary Jo Stalin- ssn: 000-00-0002
Wife's occupation: ball breaker

Address: 0000 Dead End Rd
Bullsnuts, Calif. 90000

Annual income (from AdSense) $50.00
Taxable amount: $50.00
Deductions: None (Since last month)
Taxable rate: 90% (That's because I am a CEO)
Total tax owed: $45.00 (check attached)

There, that was easy. Now for my state form (California). This should be easy. What's 10% of $50.00?.......$5.00.

Got it. Check for $5.00 to California.....and I'm finished!

We're all finished!

6 comments:

  1. Yep, CEOs have it so damn tough. My heart breaks for them.

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  2. I like your way of doing taxes better. It is much more accurate.

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  3. Bryan,

    I'm not excusing the CEOs but I hope you save some of your anger for the folks in Govt who played and continue to play a very significant role in this mess.

    For example, Barack Obama, Barney Frank, Chris Dodd, Tim Geithner et al.

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  4. Findalis,

    I didn't even need Turbo-Tax

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  5. You forgot George W. Bush and Hank Paulson on your little list, but they're conservatives so never mind them.

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  6. OK, them too. I remember a few years back, W was singing the praises of some program that enabled low-income earners to buy a home, and I assume it was the Community Reinvestment Act. If nothing else, he was asleep at the wheel at least part of the time. But it was none other than Barney Frank (backed by ACORN) who told lending institutions they better increase lending to low income folks or face discrimination investigations in Congress to be led by him and the Financial Services Committee.

    You might also investigate the relationships between Frank and Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac while you are at it. (Check out the name Herb Moses of Fannie Mae). See you smell a conflict of interest.

    Also see how much money Freddie and Fannie contributed to Chris Dodd and Barack Obama in the past few years. Ditto for AIG money to Dodd and Obama. See if you smell a conflict of interest.

    A few short years ago, the White House and several Republicans in Congress were sounding the warning alarm on Freddie and Fannie. Guess who defended them in Congress.
    Barney, Chris and Maxine Waters.
    As a result, nothing was done.

    Wasn't it Geithner who drew up the bailout deal with AIG? The same Geithner who tells us he didn't know about the big bonuses until March 10-in spite of the fact that Congressman Joe Crowley cited the 162 million dollar figure to him during his testimony before the House Ways and Means committee on March 3?


    Yes, we can condemn the CEOs and their irresponsible practices, but a lot of it is tied directly to Congress either through total incompetence, corruption or some combination thereof. And yet, the very people who are charged with cleaning this up are those who were the architects of it to begin with.

    I know you are no fan of big business, but you should be much more concerned about the corruption of people in Govt.

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